A RAVE by Grandmaster Karel van der Weide

The common man occasionally wonders what a professional chess player does all day. The ideas people have seem to differ quite a bit from person to person. Some people have images of a nerd with glasses locked up in an attic, simultaneously engrossed in several books, a rotating computer at his elbow and a table full of junkfood. Others see the professional chess player as someone who lies on his bed all day, waiting until a government agency or a private sponsor credits his bankaccount. "The truth is in the middle" -- that is what I hear you think. In my opinion, only compromises are made halfway -- life shouldn't be a compromise (or an acceptance of a "middle ground")! The best way for me to make an objective contribution about the life of the professional chess player is to give you a summary of my own affairs. I will avoid doing this in chronological order and will cover my current affairs point-for-point:

Regular reports concerning both tournaments and competitions appear from my hand in magazines and periodicals all over the world. To actually publish is the duty of every self-respecting chess player, but at the same time a danger lies in wait: Not everyone is capable of becoming a writer and many players have made a fool of themselves. Take for instance the reporting about the Corus event on a competing Dutch chess site. The journalist covering it, a certain Johan Hut, seems to live in a kind of dreamworld. He heads for Wijk aan Zee, viewing it as an Alice in Wonderland experience. "Look there: a strong chess player! And there, another strong player! I do not know where to look. However, I am delighted that I am allowed to be part of all this and tell you about it in my reports! That I am permitted to walk around in this press room, this Walhalla, this Mecca between all those people with their many concerns. What we are looking at here is real chess and not the bungling that takes place in open tournaments. And that guy Daniel .... he wins and gives me hope. The next day he loses again. He only does it to annoy me."

Disappointing. And let's just keep quiet about chess players with literary pretentions. I am not going to name names, because I have to get along and keep working with these people.

Luckily there still are chess players who can write. Many of them do that in the NEW IN CHESS magazine. The columns of Hans Ree, the obituaries by Genna Sosonko, brilliant (although many outstanding chess players these days say they want to die after Sosonko does). I am at the moment occupied with another contributor to NEW IN CHESS: Dirk-Jan ten Geuzendam. In his GEHEIME WONDER (Secret Miracle), he describes the day-to-day affairs during one of the top events in Linares. He does that quite strikingly, and when reading Ten Geuzendam's description, the desire to spend more time on chess reporting dissolves completely: to follow Linares from the press room is spending your time between vacillating dandies. Number one thinks he has found an improvement for Anand, number two reads the newspaper for the 30th time or makes his umpteenth walk over the only existing promenade. No, I would then rather play chess for a month on Curaçao.

The professional chess player hardly has any regular income. Genna already described it in a very exact manner: 7.5 points from 9 games is the big money, 7 is already a lot less, and 6.5 is nothing more than tipping money. And as you will understand, most players finish on 6.5 points or less. Fixed sources of income for me are the training sessions for the chess federation (although I tend to be rather anxious after every published article that their letter of dismissal will drop through my front door); and (foreign) competitions. You normally get a fixed amount for these. Some colleagues play in as many as six different countries. There was a time I had four; this is now down to three. Playing in a team does not agree with me, however. The responsibility is a heavy burden. If I play for myself, then I do not harm anyone with my brand of chess café game. Another disadvantage of competitions is that there isn't a second game in which you can take revenge.

Miton - Van der Weide (Belgium)
1.d4 Nf6 2.c4 c5 3.d5 b5 4. Nf3 g6 5.Nbd2 Qa5 6.e4 bxc4 7.Bxc4 Ba6 8.0-0 Bg7 9.e5! Ng4

10.e6! f5 11.exd7+ Nxd7 12.d6! Nge5 13.Nxe5 Nxe5 14.Nb3 Qb6 15.d7+ Kd8 16.Bxa6 Qxa6 17.Nxc5 Qc6 18.Be3 Rb8 19.Rc1 Nxd7 20.Qd3! Qd6 21.Rfd1, 1-0. Comment is unnecessary. I am ill for a week after this kind of game.

Affairs at home: Whether you believe me or not, the sink, toilet and faucets at the home of a professional chess player need to be cleaned once in a while (or quite frequently). Just as is the case with most of my colleagues, my financial situation is not such that I can subcontract this to anyone. Therefore, I often find myself on my knees. The professional chess player further needs to fill up his fridge and switch on his washing machine. My working place needs maintenance. Even then it can be difficult to start the production process, especially when they are doing pile-work on the adjacent building plot.

Then there are social contacts, in general with other chess players. Nothing special, this happens in every trade. My contacts with non-chess players are rare, but need to be cherished. It is a good way to keep in touch with developments elsewhere in society.

I need to point out a certain kind of social contact: the relationship between male chess players and women. The most astonishing rumors go round. As you know, female chess players are a distinct minority. They are enjoying overwhelming attention from their male colleagues. This phenomenon, where chess players are looking for a chess playing woman, originates from the mistaken idea that they then will be understood. Here is some good advice for all women who cannot get a man: just join a chess club (any chess club will do). Even if you are as ugly as hell, and have a bottom like an elephant, it does not matter. Success is guaranteed.

I have given the following piece of advice to many chess players and to quite a number of young grandmasters: Look for a female companion outside chess! Lady friends of friends or of your relatives is best; they already passed the screening process. The development these days where one tries to find his/her match through dating sites is worrying and short of the mark. These kind of superficial contacts are an outgrowth of modern society.

My own situation? In any case, no woman chess player for me. I recently made another attempt to win back my "ex." Result? Now she really never wants to see me again. It is interesting to observe how the human psyche then reacts to this. This varies between: "She actually is quite right," and an email with the text, "I give you one week head-start and then you better hide."

Concluding (prize context for readers at home: look for the Donner quotes): the professional chess player lives a life like many other people, between hope and fear. He has simplified his life by playing chess, and his world has become quite small. But he is free; the last robber knight in a society of slaves.