CHESS & SEX

Sex is an odd thing – it’s viewed from a completely different lens than almost everything else. For example, violence is a ubiquitous part of television, often showing us brutal murders, overwhelming natural disasters, slasher killings, and the snuffing out of endless numbers of “bad guys.” Nobody pays much attention to this, and even small children impassively sit in front of the TV and watch the body count rise with nary a raising of their eyebrows. Yet, when the famous breast/nipple appeared onscreen for a nanosecond, the whole country went berserk with outrage.

DEPT OF HOMELAND SECURITY DISCOVERS:

JJs NIPPLE, MAGNIFIED 5,000 TIMES, SHOWN TO BE LURKING

Other examples of the skewed view of sex:

* Clinton gets impeached for something that should have been a private matter (sex), while Bush (who apparently didn’t even warrant a censure) bankrupted the nation, demonstrably lies every time he opens his mouth, and is responsible for a horrific civilian death toll in Iraq (violence).  [Just in case the mentally challenged bring this up: No, I don’t hate America and I don’t support the terrorists.]

* Photo exhibits of Mapplethorpe’s work created nationwide hysteria.

* Fearful that a new product might (by some insane leap of the imagination) convince women to have sex before marriage, the religious right is trying to suppress a HPV (cervical cancer) vaccine (the interested reader should check out an article by Michael Specter in the March 13 issue of THE NEW YORKER). Let’s see … a horrifying death by cervical cancer, or women acting like the characters in Sex in the City. Apparently, for some, it’s a hard choice.

* Sex is used in every area of consumerism. Male and female models sell us clothes, makeup, various scents, food, and everything else. Professional football and basketball have cheerleaders entertaining the spectators. Yet, implied sexuality and actual sexuality create very different reactions from the U.S. populace.

What’s so strange about this “sex is evil” view is that, while violence and intolerance are things we would like to end, sexuality is a natural part of the human condition. I’m at a loss as to why it’s so threatening.

This small article, though, isn’t about sexuality per se. It’s about chess and sex/eroticism. And, as shown by the reactions to my RAVE ABOUT CHESS BITCH, the chess world is quite a conservative place. While many get upset about any mention of sex in chess, implied sexuality is tolerated. Who can forget one of the most sexually charged chess scenes in film history, THE THOMAS CROWN AFFAIR (1968), where Steve McQueen and Faye Dunaway stare longingly at each other while fingering the chess pieces? Yet, chess fans were so happy to see chess on the big screen that the implication was “forgiven” in light of the notoriety that our game/sport/art garnered.

I’ve long held that chess would gain in popularity if it had more colorful (dare I say it: sexually charged) players who could grab the attention of the man/woman off the street. Once people see that chess is not just for nerds, but also for real people who love all that life has to offer, more people might give it a serious try.

While I’m not advocating cheerleaders for each nation’s chess team in the chess Olympiad (On second thought, why not use cheerleading mimes?), a little more “erotic implication” couldn’t hurt. For people claiming that this would make the game unsuitable for children, how many parents pull their kids away from Sunday night football or the basketball playoffs because of the dancing girls waving pompoms? How many parents pull their children away from the TV when commercials come on? Sexual implication is everywhere, and making chess a sex-free desert does far more harm than good.

Fortunately, a few brave souls have unabashedly embraced erotic implication in chess for fun and profit and, in some cases, for art. Let’s look at a couple of examples.

ALEXANDRA KOSTENIUK: Beauty, Brains, and Chess Muscle

This young woman was, at one time, attacked by many people for her risqué photographs. She didn’t hide the fact that she was sexy and beautiful, and why should she? However, she is also a very sweet, intelligent, well-liked person. AND, she just happens to be one of the strongest women chess players of all time (she is one of only a handful of women to have earned the grandmaster title).

If you would like to find out more about this very popular chess celebrity, check out ALEXANDRA KOSTENIUK'S WEBSITE.

MARIA MANAKOVA: Making Use of Her Assets

Maria Manakova, a strong player (her high FIDE rating was 2395) and very attractive young woman, claims that women would get far more attention from journalists and spectators if they would embrace their sexuality. To find out more about her, check out the

CHESSBASE ARTICLE ABOUT MARIA MANAKOVA.

By the way, don’t forget to stick the FANTASTIC CHESSBASE WEBSITE in your “favorites” list.

YOUNG MEN BEHAVING BADLY?

On a more self-serving note, a group of male chess aficionados (Robert Fontaine of France, Alexander Grischuk of Russia, Artur Kogan of Spain, Gilberto Milos of Brazil, Nigel Short of Greece, Vladislav Tkachiev of France, and Dimitri Tyomkin of Canada) got together and, admitting their love of the ladies, decided to create a WORLD CHESS BEAUTY CONTEST. It’s not to be taken too seriously (Or is it? Many woman are outraged by this site and claim it borders on stalking.), but what’s wrong with a little fun between the male and female “beautiful people” in chess? (Oh, oh, I might have to get rid of that “beautiful people” label – I just realized that Nigel is on the list).

BIKINI CLAD CHESS TEACHERS

Thus far we’ve seen a couple of examples of innocent (and perhaps savvy) self-promotion and juvenile fun. Next up is something “a bit different,” but feel free to apply any label you choose. Mr. Clint Ballard has his own vision about chess, much of it stressing the idea that chess has to become sexier. He also feels that attractive women (in this case, as chess instructors on video) will make chess more palatable for the non-chessplaying public.

In his own words:

“The models are from the Pacific North West modeling community. None of them knew much more than how the pieces moved, if that much, when they started the project. It is not easy to find beautiful models who are willing to wear skimpy bikinis who also are willing to do chess lessons who can actually do them, so I do have to spend a lot of time recruiting. However, I am quite pleased at how quickly some of them have learned. I am of course, biased, but I feel that they are quite effective at teaching the basic concepts.”

What’s all this about? Well, some chess friends sent me a link that showed some very interesting bikini-clad ladies lounging on a giant chessboard (http://www.slugfest7.com/). I had no idea what it was all about, so I contacted the site’s owner, Mr. Ballard, and he explained that this is a prelude to a planned pay site (due up sometime this year) that features serious video chess instruction by models wearing skimpy bikinis (there’s lots more, all chess oriented).

Click on MR. BALLARD'S OTHER SITE to get more information about his upcoming pay venture, or to get contact info.

CHESS AS ART

For those that aren’t offended by nudity in art, this German site might be for you. The artist features some tasteful, ARTISTIC IMAGES OF THE HUMAN FORM and CHESS.